Best Holiday Jokes 2020 - Jim Gaffigan

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6 сарын өмнө

Here are the funniest Holiday jokes from my standup career! Featuring Christmas, Easter, Halloween, Valentine's Day, and more! PALE TOURIST is NOW streaming on Amazon.
:00 - Christmas Tree
1:15 - Easter
1:41 - Overeating
2:23 - Halloween
3:35 - Valentines Day
5:13 - Gift Giving
5:45 - Robe
7:15 - Fruit Cake
7:52 - Thanksgiving
8:31 - Santas Belt
9:32 - New years Resolution
10:32 - In-Laws
11:31 - A Disney Christmas
13:49 - Birthday Jesus
16:31 - Thanksgiving
19:08 - Valentines Day
Fast Food
Asian American (Full Set)
Florida Man (Full Set)
Halifax Donair
Drake Story
My Wife's Brain Tumor
My Least Favorite Doctor
UK vs US
Morning Person
Steak is Manly
Idiot Abroad
Easier to be a Guy
Big Family
Bath vs Shower
Can't Stop Eating
Fitness Goals
Home Birth
Big Family
Waffle House
Hot Pockets
I'm Korean
Doing Nothing
Out To Dinner
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Meatball Parm
Peas & Corn
Mikey Takes Over
Oatmeal Soup
Garbage Plate
Chicken Fillet
Bacon Wrapped Steaks
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Daddy Dog
Hot Pocket
Garden Veggies
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Jim Gaffigan is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer and producer. He presently has 5 stand up specials on Netflix and 3 on Amazon Prime Video. He wrote 2 New York Times Best Sellers DAD IS FAT and FOOD: A Love Story He co-created and starred in a tv series based on his life called The Jim Gaffigan Show. He has appeared in numerous TV shows and films in both comedic and dramatic roles.
TEXT JIM 646-980-6600

erwinraaben55 14 өдрийн өмнө
1:21 literally sitting on the 2nd day of Easter opening my first boiled egg :P
T Moon
T Moon 15 өдрийн өмнө
Sean Shores
Sean Shores 23 өдрийн өмнө
Some of the best standup material ever. Even better than Carlin
Lynne Wright - Glzrbug
Lynne Wright - Glzrbug Сарын өмнө
Jim is the perfect “Everyman”. He is so relatable. He makes telling clean jokes look easy but it takes being very talented and clever. It is refreshing to find a comedian that does not to use f bombs and cruelty for shock value laughs.
BarrySmithViolin Сарын өмнө
Seriously, Gaffigan is a comedic genius... His ability to observe true reality and transform it into great, real and clean comedy that always works, is so great!...🌟🌟🌟
Kathryn Mast
Kathryn Mast Сарын өмнө
So, MNdown just played a Disney vacation commercial. 🤣
Jessica Mizuwasa
Jessica Mizuwasa 2 сарын өмнө
It's called dressing cuz you don't cook it inside the bird
Rk Jackson
Rk Jackson 2 сарын өмнө
Walt Disney was a Nazi sympathizer and a bigot. NOT supporting Disney or any MAN MADE RELIGION!
Charlene Mack
Charlene Mack 2 сарын өмнө
Jim proves you can be very funny without the “f” word.
Lee Connors
Lee Connors Сарын өмнө
MrCooj92 2 сарын өмнө
Don't worry there's a bunny 🐰🐇
357 Magnum
357 Magnum 2 сарын өмнө
Google: the true origin of christmas; the true origin of easter (ishtar); just a couple of ways satan's deceiving many (also google: what's wrong about the catholic religion) don't shoot the messenger 👍🙏✝️
MR LORD 2 сарын өмнө
If Jim doesn't like things cooked inside dead animals, I wonder how he would deal with Rôti Sans Pareil 😅 For those who don't know, it's 17 different birds stuffed inside each other, then cooked
Hymedude 3 сарын өмнө
Lol makes me wonder is the Christmas tree some sort of ritualistic symbolic sacrifice...interesting...
Nessuno 3 сарын өмнө
Dressing actually is 'stuffing' baked outside of the bird, whereas, stuffing is just what it says it is! Most people do both as there usually isn't enough room in the cavities and under the skin of a turkey to satisfy a crowd.😋I REALLY want some stuffing now!
Erica Ferguson
Erica Ferguson 3 сарын өмнө
He got me with the robe!!!!! I wear one all the time and I’m pretty sure I look insane 😂😂😂😂
Elizabeth Shaw
Elizabeth Shaw 3 сарын өмнө
Dressing isn't put into the bird and it's full of chicken meat.
Elizabeth Shaw
Elizabeth Shaw 3 сарын өмнө
The 12 Days of Christmas begin on Christmas Day and go 12 Days full word until the Epiphany when the wise men found the baby Jesus. The 12 Days of Christmas do not begin December first and if it's done that way then it would need to begin on December 13th to take it to the 25th! That is just stupid I can't believe nobody Google's The 12 Days of Christmas because you will find exactly what I have said here. Numbnuts. I didn't say that my evil twin did! :-)
Elizabeth Shaw
Elizabeth Shaw 3 сарын өмнө
People have to go on my fruit cake list every year because so many people want them. I also make a non fruit cake fruit cake that is even more popular.
Elizabeth Shaw
Elizabeth Shaw 3 сарын өмнө
I purchase cards with blank insides and write my own.
Kerry Klopfstein
Kerry Klopfstein 3 сарын өмнө
Jim and Brian Regan are the best
Holly Stone
Holly Stone 3 сарын өмнө
its stuffing in the bird and dressing if its cooked separately
Theodor Williams
Theodor Williams 3 сарын өмнө
Watching this in bed, volume way up so I can hear over my c pap & I start choking & laughing & my wife woke & though we were having a earthquake.
christian 4 сарын өмнө
When is this dude gonna just come out and admit he's jesse plemons dad
Justine Weikel
Justine Weikel 4 сарын өмнө
Jim you are so funny and relatable! I am in tears watching you. I have spent all day now watching you and the only bad thing about that is I'm running out of clips. Thank you for the smiles and laughter!
Robert Pembroke
Robert Pembroke 4 сарын өмнө
Covid19 Xmas Royal Joke 2020 "I'm not sure about Rolfe, my darling Charles." My handsome wife Diana, may she rest in peace, said as she watched Rolfe talking to Mum about the nature of royal portraiture and the value of perspective before continuing. "I found oil paint marks between the cheeks of Williams bottom. When I queried Rolfe about the burnt sienna on young Williams undies he turned to me and replied that the paint brush had to be rested somewhere for he was famished and needed a cucumber sandwich." Recordings from the candid Royal Diaries of Camilla Parker-Bowls, Buckingham Palace on a windy day. " Leave Conan's robot faeries at home to dream of electronic sheep counting apples before falling asleep in the rabbit hole." Harry said as he felt the Captain rub his bristles ever so gently against his cheek in that usual murky London pea soup fog that often conceals Big Ben when the clock is being reset. according to Greenwiche mean time. " -Famous quote of Andy Pandy.
ARKHAMxMaverick 4 сарын өмнө
Over the course of the clips in this video you can really see Jim getting........well...anyway, Merry Christmas everybody.
davissae 4 сарын өмнө
Even his holiday jokes are just about holiday food 🤣🤣🤣
Chinedu Atisele
Chinedu Atisele 4 сарын өмнө
Great Comedy 😂!
Sharon Haynes
Sharon Haynes 4 сарын өмнө
we are going to Disney....but I can't walk....too true...we will put you in a cart
Tonya Wilson
Tonya Wilson 4 сарын өмнө
I'm from the South, we don't cook the dressing inside the bird, it's in a big baking pan alongside of the bird
fun_paparazzi 4 сарын өмнө
We call it “stuffing” instead of “cram-it-in”, because the cram-berries got it first
M Ro
M Ro 4 сарын өмнө
The king of clean humor! Love Jim's work, this is art.
Bianca Lauren
Bianca Lauren 4 сарын өмнө
I went to a movie with 30 people I didn’t even know that was legal Well I’ve got news for you...
Robin Alberti
Robin Alberti 4 сарын өмнө
This guy is my hero... LoL 😂
Robin Alberti
Robin Alberti 4 сарын өмнө
I want you hear're wrong... LoL ...this is elder abuse! 😂
Robin Alberti
Robin Alberti 4 сарын өмнө
OMG the gamble chocolate 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Robin Alberti
Robin Alberti 4 сарын өмнө
Lyn Hurst
Lyn Hurst 4 сарын өмнө
We make dressing in a separate pan. Not inside the turkey
Aiyan Turley
Aiyan Turley 4 сарын өмнө
I share the same Birthday with you Jim 😹 0707
Destinations Chronicles
Destinations Chronicles 4 сарын өмнө
I am the grandparent that drags the kids and grandkids to Disneyland. So opposite!
Michelle Post
Michelle Post 4 сарын өмнө
He is so hilarious. Most of us can identify with his jokes.
Susanne Wolf
Susanne Wolf 5 сарын өмнө
68 thumbs down, just want to make sure noone from my neighborhood.: do not talk to me. I am not your kind of people, ok.
None Yo Business
None Yo Business 5 сарын өмнө
Let's be clear on one thing, Christmas and Easter are Pegan holiday's and not tied to Jesus in anyway. Easter represents his resurrection not bunnies and hiding eggs!
Fred Stevens
Fred Stevens 3 сарын өмнө
It's all bs anyway
Cool Mark
Cool Mark 5 сарын өмнө
He’s his own heckler 😂
Lee Connors
Lee Connors Сарын өмнө
Yes! Perfect! I was trying to think of how to describe what he does with his alter voice. Its so weird and funny!
Elliott 5 сарын өмнө
It'd called appropriation of pagan holidays enjoyed by the majority when christianity was forced down their throats... Duh
Samayah Jan
Samayah Jan 5 сарын өмнө
Beautiful articulating of normal and hilarious human interactions. The gaffs done it again🤭🤗
Kayla Bowman
Kayla Bowman 5 сарын өмнө
He kind of hit my bday and christmas at same time. My birthday is december 23rd and as a kid everyone did my bday on christmas eve as all the outter family comes to the main house (Old polish family) so the year I wanted and needed socks....I didnt get any. I was kind of used to getting socks for both birthday and christmas. As soon as I got into to college and say I want/need socks, underwear, bras, and some household one bought them for me. I have asked for blankets this year so I can save on my heating bill. I have learned a thing or too from birthday and christmas presents. A heating blanket would be nice for this year but might just buy myself one.
Scott Thomas
Scott Thomas 6 сарын өмнө
Very hilarious comedian
Luke Anderson
Luke Anderson 6 сарын өмнө
How is anyone disliking this??????
Luke Anderson
Luke Anderson 6 сарын өмнө
This video. Not my comment
NavyVet9702 6 сарын өмнө
"I got the one filled with toothpaste." Next second, Colgate ad.
John Sagan
John Sagan 6 сарын өмнө
The last 3mins of this one made me wonder: Is Jim almost channeling Andy Rueney? I didnt know thats something I desperately need and you are the best person to do it! Please see this comment Jim, if none of my other ones! talk at ya later Jim, dont let your meatloaf!
SteakN Fries
SteakN Fries 6 сарын өмнө
😂LOL Genius😂
Brian Joyce
Brian Joyce 6 сарын өмнө
Jim is a gem
Peter Pipr
Peter Pipr 6 сарын өмнө
I must be the most prolific comic that ever lived I would be able to come up with new Thanksgiving jokes
Gr8 Teagazr
Gr8 Teagazr 6 сарын өмнө
For me, the holidays begin with Halloween. It just makes plain sense. *wink
Jeremy D
Jeremy D 6 сарын өмнө
I tried fruit cake after I saw his bit a few years ago. This is accurate
Joann Dehnert
Joann Dehnert 6 сарын өмнө
You look thinner!
GeminieCricket 6 сарын өмнө
Wish we were clapping in person in a best are these videos. Thank you! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Pronker Pronker
Pronker Pronker 6 сарын өмнө
Always love your work, just a pleasure to visit.
Atrophy Queen
Atrophy Queen 6 сарын өмнө
Ive heard stuffing called butthole bread.
Marshall Edmundson
Marshall Edmundson 6 сарын өмнө
Where can i find that purple jacket?lol fuckin awesome!
jmatos316 6 сарын өмнө
I bet you are glad the Holidays are still COVID--- Dont have to spend all the holiday with all 30 of your inlaws :D
Pangkou Lee
Pangkou Lee 5 сарын өмнө
Autumn Marr
Autumn Marr 6 сарын өмнө
If Jesus walked around with 12, I guess the devil walked around with 13. Or was it 6? I don't know
cyoungledesma 6 сарын өмнө
Mr Rogers...meow meow, I remember being pretty little and thinking...I hate this Kingdom part of the show!
Louise Rose
Louise Rose 6 сарын өмнө
Thank you Jim!!
LISA CURD 6 сарын өмнө
(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Sally Stege
Sally Stege 6 сарын өмнө
Deep Water
Deep Water 6 сарын өмнө
Thanks this showsme how I should be thankful everyday and yes we always need reminders to be kind to one another
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
That's deeeeep.
E A 6 сарын өмнө
Whose thumbs downing this. Freakin haters man.
GeminieCricket 6 сарын өмнө
newlife nowife
newlife nowife 6 сарын өмнө
no , not haters .... just i m not laughing....... i laugh at george carlin '; you may not !!! that s ok ; we ve all got different tastes ... enjoy your life .......
sonal pandya
sonal pandya 6 сарын өмнө
Thank you so much Jim! I am forwarding this to all my friends that need a good laugh in these crazy times. You help us all get through!
Athina Mplank
Athina Mplank 6 сарын өмнө
No by
patricia pantano
patricia pantano 6 сарын өмнө
Well, I’ve done it. I’ve watched every single MNdown comedy upload, I’ve watched the prime stand up concerts - several times,. Now what? #hungryformore
Fred Stevens
Fred Stevens 3 сарын өмнө
cyoungledesma 6 сарын өмнө
patricia pantano dry bar comedy is good
Mishta Moose
Mishta Moose 6 сарын өмнө
The ending is just recycled jokes. I don't think we needed that...
Mishta Moose
Mishta Moose 4 сарын өмнө
@Ray Bin No worries.
Ray Bin
Ray Bin 4 сарын өмнө
@Mishta Moose Didn't notice that! (I didn't finish watching video tho!)
Mishta Moose
Mishta Moose 4 сарын өмнө
@Ray Bin The whole stuffing part was taken directly from the first bit of the video, so how on earth did they not hear already? He even said the exact same words!
Ray Bin
Ray Bin 4 сарын өмнө
@Mishta Moose Note that some people have not heard those jokes before. He has repeated lots of them in other videos - having so much material could make it difficult to avoid duplicating too!
Mishta Moose
Mishta Moose 4 сарын өмнө
@Ray Bin Think of it this way. If someone was making a video of them playing a game and they got lazy and just edited so the first part of the video played at the end aswell, everyone would think that it's useless. But marry christmas to you aswell. I hope you have fun even though we're in a pandemic.
Magic minecraft Show
Magic minecraft Show 6 сарын өмнө
Bringing laughter to everyone every day
Jules G.
Jules G. 6 сарын өмнө
King of clean comedy 🤴🏼
Natalie Dennings
Natalie Dennings 6 сарын өмнө
I love his Karen alter ego voice, hey fella.
Wayne Marvin
Wayne Marvin 12 өдрийн өмнө
@Mark Demell Casual slander and off-hand categorization.
Lee Connors
Lee Connors Сарын өмнө
My favorite part XD
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
@FUMI Well that is just stupid because it really slanders a persons name . Just call it as you see it ,ugh.Labelling just sucks .Don't be a Nimrod ,now that's one for ya!
FUMI 3 сарын өмнө
@Mark Demell Karen - is slang term for an obnoxious, angry, entitled, and often middle-aged woman who uses her privilege to get her way or police other people's behaviors. Thats shockingly from 😅
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
Karen who? I am confused.
Herne Webber
Herne Webber 6 сарын өмнө
At 3:01, JIM, if we were both single and mutually attracted, I'd give you all the "candy" you could handle. Meanwhile, my husband is okay... 🙄 Say hi to the woman who has us all eating our hearts out, that wildebeest wife of yours, and thank your mom. Seriously, all my love to you, as much as I can give to a random stranger, whose comedy I love.
V 13
V 13 6 сарын өмнө
Jim you're such a blessing. Thank you for bringing joy to all of us. God bless you and your lovely family! Stay well.
Christopher Rosenquist
Christopher Rosenquist 6 сарын өмнө
Everyday before I go to sleep I watch a clip, and you always make me laugh. I’ve heard every joke a 100 times and I still burst into tears. You’re truly a master of your craft!
Eileen Sanford
Eileen Sanford 10 өдрийн өмнө
Eric Hines
Eric Hines 6 сарын өмнө
Stuffing and dressing are different things. Dressing is actually cooked in a pan, not in the turkey. My family has it every year. lol
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
Really? Wow!
Chris young
Chris young 5 сарын өмнө
Figaro Hey! Big Macs are garbage but still delicious
Figaro Hey!
Figaro Hey! 6 сарын өмнө
@Chris young They call it STovetop STuffing purely for the alliteration & because anyone who would buy that crap can't cook & doesn't know the difference anyway.
Chris young
Chris young 6 сарын өмнө
Eric Hinesy my mom used to crank out a good in the bird kind with toasted sourdough that you could feast on solo for days.
Eric Hines
Eric Hines 6 сарын өмнө
@Chris young I'm not sure what every ingredient is cause I don't know the recipe, but it's good. My mom makes it as a regular dinner every so often cause it stands on its own so well. Cover it in some giblet gravy and it's over. You'll need a nap when you're done.
Patricia Jaramillo
Patricia Jaramillo 6 сарын өмнө
Another fantastic funny video. Feels good to laugh.
Rosa Romero
Rosa Romero 6 сарын өмнө
Thank you for making life livable! You always make my day a happy one!
Drew The Unspoken
Drew The Unspoken 6 сарын өмнө
These videos are brief holidays for 2020. Keep 'em coming, Jim!
SunFae Stardust
SunFae Stardust 6 сарын өмнө
Awwwwwwwww,Hiii and ThankYou 🌞🌛🌟🎶🌈 so great, I and we send love and light:)))))))))))♡☆
Tellme Truth
Tellme Truth 6 сарын өмнө
Well, the physical world ends Hanukkah 2020. The Earth will implode and ignite. We will all be translated into our spiritual form. Hallelujah! So be it. Shalom....
Beeble Brox
Beeble Brox 6 сарын өмнө
Lorrie 6 сарын өмнө
Dunk the belt in the toilet! Yup.
Karl Baschal
Karl Baschal 6 сарын өмнө
Thanks for the humor. It is much appreciated. Made my day.
linshanhsiang 6 сарын өмнө
Good fruitcake (and yes there is such a thing) is delicious. Just stop thinking of it as cake because it's not...more like nut bread plus dried fruit. Okay?
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
I get a sore jaw from eating that stuff.
Figaro Hey!
Figaro Hey! 6 сарын өмнө
Buy it from the Abbey of Gethsemane, Gethsemane Farms in Kentucky. Made by monks who use Kentucky bourbon in the aging process.
Figaro Hey!
Figaro Hey! 6 сарын өмнө
@Daniel Dunn Its basted in alcohol all that time to flavor it. It's not the same as birthday cake. Totally different food. If you don't know what you're talking about (fruitcake, what it actually is), maybe don't comment until you do a little research.
Daniel Dunn
Daniel Dunn 6 сарын өмнө
People buy fruitcake from a catalog and then wonder why it sucks. It's only like 6 months old by time you get it.
linshanhsiang 6 сарын өмнө
@Craig G True dat!
linshanhsiang 6 сарын өмнө
Easter egg also a pagan fertility symbol, spring, regeneration of life, etc. Funny since Jesus is SUPPOSED to have been a bachelor lol!
Marcela Garcia
Marcela Garcia 6 сарын өмнө
Regeneration of life = Resurrection
Rachel T.
Rachel T. 6 сарын өмнө
Pagan traditions are intertwined with Christian holidays for reasons having to do with successful conversion of pagans to Christianity, back in the day
linshanhsiang 6 сарын өмнө
Two bucks for a greeting card? How long has it been since Jim bought any greeting cards?!!! Oh, I know, he buys them at the dollar store! (And if you don't you're a fool)!
Kayla Bowman
Kayla Bowman 5 сарын өмнө
My dollar stores has some 2 for $1
newlife nowife
newlife nowife 6 сарын өмнө
right,, i m a platinum customer at the dollar store ..... just a dollar , not 2...
Pete Schreiber
Pete Schreiber 6 сарын өмнө
Great, funny stuff, thanks Jim.
linshanhsiang 6 сарын өмнө
The Christmas tree is an ancient Germanic fertility'm guessing the Gaffigans have been very devout supporters of the tree tradition lol. Love ya Jim!
linshanhsiang 6 сарын өмнө
Take it easy....I was!
E A 6 сарын өмнө
Omg it was a joke I’m sure he knows or just doesn’t care
HEE-HEE MAN 6 сарын өмнө
Bro jesus do be my favorite anime character
Sue Brown
Sue Brown 6 сарын өмнө
Another great video..and now I’d like some more “dressing”..Wink!
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
Now I am triggered to eat poutine.
RuleofFive 6 сарын өмнө
You know I've been unemployed for months. I've run out of my unemployment benefit. I had Covid 19 and I'm stressed out. Yet Jim posts these clips from his shows everyday and its 10 minutes or so to forget about things for awhile! Thanks Jim!
RuleofFive Сарын өмнө
@Shi-Quan Nettingham Thanks.
Shi-Quan Nettingham
Shi-Quan Nettingham Сарын өмнө
Hope you’re doing well! ❤️
BarrySmithViolin Сарын өмнө
@RuleofFive Good to know
RuleofFive Сарын өмнө
@BarrySmithViolin Thank you I am.
BarrySmithViolin Сарын өмнө
Hope you are feeling better these days! ❤️
Kaylee 6 сарын өмнө
🤔 Disney World happiest place on earth is CLOSED. SO NO ONE IS HAPPY ON EARTH! Laugh out loud. Thanks pandemic, new household bad word. 🗣👎
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
Hey have faith ,the Almighty sent some one to save us .It won't be much longer .
Lara O'neal
Lara O'neal 6 сарын өмнө
Ty Jim I needed this this morning. Laughing is so therapeutic.
Lara O'neal
Lara O'neal 3 сарын өмнө
@Mark Demell That is also in the Bible.
Mark Demell
Mark Demell 3 сарын өмнө
According to readers digest ,laughter is good medicine .
Kaylee 6 сарын өмнө
👉 Hey JIM, you do a great cat impression.This was great 🤣🤣🤣.Hey, on Kelly&Ryan today 10.1.20 a "specialist" said we can change our emotions on our own. #1 way was listen to a comic. So I laughed. NO SHIT SHERLOCK. 🙃
Elijah C
Elijah C 6 сарын өмнө
Over it your kids sound like a lot of fun
Elijah C
Elijah C 6 сарын өмнө
Elijah C
Elijah C 6 сарын өмнө
Read your book it's really funny
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